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Kalei og jeg – Speilvendt
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Kalei og jeg


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Barns fantasivenner er ufarlige og knyttet til positiv utvikling, skal man tro både forskning og kasusbeskrivelsen av min egen lek med den usynlige gutten Kalei.

 

Da jeg ble født, var storesøstrene mine henholdsvis elleve, femten og sytten år gamle, og begge foreldrene mine hadde rundet førti. En klassisk attpåklatt, med andre ord. Selv om jeg var et veldig ønsket barn (det har jeg i alle fall blitt fortalt), og familien sto i kø for å kose og susse og degge med meg, hadde jeg tidvis en ganske ensom barndom. På endeløse familieferier var det aldri noen å leke med.

Ikke så rart, kanskje, at jeg lagde med en fantasivenn; Kalei het han. Jeg husker ham ikke selv, men mor og far mimrer ofte tilbake til min regelmessige lek med Kalei. Den var som regel hyggelig, men like ofte kranglet Kalei og jeg, og han fikk gjerne skylden når noe var forsvunnet eller ødelagt. Praktisk!

Innimellom lekte jeg også med dyr som ingen andre kunne se; det var rosa hester, gule griser og lilla neshorn. Uten blygsel erklærte jeg at hestene var flinkere på ski enn far, mens neshornet ikke skjønte noen ting av dette med ski, stakkars. Dette til forbigående skiløperes store forbauselse og skjensel for min yngste storesøster, som syntes jeg var et særdeles merkelig barn.

Jeg lagde meg en fantasivenn; Kalei het han.

 

Skybert og Karlsson på taket. For et halvt århundre siden ville mange ha delt min søsters bekymring. Bøker om barneoppdragelse oppfordret foreldre til å begrense barnas fantasivennlek, og et vanlig synspunkt i psykiatrien var at fantasivenner var tegn på psykose eller annen psykopatologi.

Også i dag florerer såkalte mammafora med bekymrete spørsmål om barnas fantasilek, og den gemene hop gir mer eller mindre betryggende svar.

I barnelitteraturen har fascinasjonen for fantasivenner vært stor. Alle husker for eksempel Skybert og Karlsson på taket. Selv om fantasifigurene som ble skildret av Gunilla Bergström og Astrid Lindgren ikke nødvendigvis har vært så greie hele tiden, har fantasivennene aldri vært tegn på psykopatologi hos barna som hadde dem. Det kan jo være en trøst for både urolige foreldre og flaue storesøstre.

 

Fantasivenner – et vanlig fenomen. Antagelser fra 1900-tallets psykiatri, mammafora og barnelitteratur til side: Hva vet vi egentlig om barn med fantasivenner? Bortsett fra noen få unntak, som Margaret Svendsens tidlige studier fra 1934, har forskningsinteressen for disse barna inntil nylig vært begrenset.

Dette er rart, særlig tatt i betraktning at fantasivenner, definert som usynlige karakterer som blir referert til i samtale med andre, eller lekt med direkte over en lengre periode og som til en viss grad oppleves virkelige for barnet, er et forbausende vanlig fenomen: Jerome Singer hevdet i 1990 at så mange som 65 % har en fantasivenn i løpet av barneårene, og Espen Klausen dokumenterte i 2006 at selv de mest nøkterne nyere estimater viser at fantasivenner forekommer hos i hvert fall opp mot 20 % av alle barn.

Denne informasjonen kan jo være betryggende for dem som frykter at barnas fantasivennlek grenser til psykoseproblematikk, for ingen vil vel hevde at den slags psykopatologi kjennetegner en så stor andel av barnepopulasjonen. Trolig er fantasivenner flest del av et normalt utviklingsforløp, selv om langt fra alle har en fantasivenn.

Innenfor normalområdet kan det likevel være store variasjoner. Den høye forekomsten av barn både med og uten fantasivenner genererer spørsmål om hvorvidt disse barna skiller seg fra hverandre også på andre områder, dog innenfor det som kan karakteriseres som normalt.

 

Hva sier forskningen? Én pioner innen fantasivennforskningen er Marjorie Taylor. Hun er en av få som har forsket på barn med fantasivenner i en årrekke, og publiserte en bok om temaet i 1999. Utover 2000-tallet økte interessen for barn med fantasivenner også blant andre fagfolk, og selv om datamaterialet fremdeles er begrenset, vet vi nå en hel del mer.

Det interessante er at studiene, i motsetning til hva mange tidligere fryktet, har en tendens til å assosiere tilstedeværelsen av fantasivenner med ekstra positiv utvikling innenfor en rekke domener.

Selv om resultatene ikke er fullstendig entydige, finnes det etter hvert mye dokumentasjon på at barn med fantasivenner har høyere sosial kompetanse, bedre språk- og kommunikasjonsferdigheter og en mer velutviklet sinnforståelse enn barn uten. De er mer kreative og har bedre fantasi, og er verken ensommere eller har flere psykiske forstyrrelser enn barnepopulasjonen for øvrig.

 

Fører fantasivenner til et bedre utviklingsforløp? Ut fra de nyere studiene kan det være fristende å konkludere med at tilstedeværelsen av fantasivenner fører til et mer positivt utviklingsforløp, men man må naturligvis skille mellom korrelasjon og kausalitet.

Fordi man ikke kan indusere fantasivenner i barn eksperimentelt – de enten er der, eller så er de det ikke – er fantasivennforskningen i sin natur korrelasjonell, og man møter på de klassiske retnings- og tredjevariabelsproblemene.

Fører tilstedeværelsen av fantasivenner til for eksempel bedre sinnforståelse, er det god sinnforståelse som får barn til å skape fantasivenner, eller kan ett eller flere andre fenomener forklare den etablerte sammenhengen?

Taylor har argumentert sterkt for et årsaksforhold mellom fantasivenner og andre fenomener. Hun mener for eksempel at lek med fantasivenner, på samme måte som lek med virkelige venner, letter barns utvikling av sinnforståelse. Man kan imidlertid også argumentere for at sinnforståelse er en forutsetning for å skape fantasivenner. Dessuten kan det hende at påvirkningen går begge veier – hvis det altså er et årsaksforhold her.

 Selv de mest nøkterne nyere estimater viser at fantasivenner forekommer hos i hvert fall opp mot 20 % av alle barn.

 

En transaksjonsforståelse. Muligens er det for enkelt å spørre hva som fører til hva. I boken Utviklingspsykologi fra 2012, fremhever Stephen von Tetzchner at man må benytte en transaksjonsmodell for å få en full forståelse av hva som former et utviklingsforløp. Man må altså se på hvordan individet og miljøet har påvirket hverandre gjensidig og over tid. I tilfellet med fantasivenner og sinnforståelse kan man se for seg at en sammenheng mellom de to fenomenene kommer av nettopp en gjensidig påvirkning mellom dem, og påvirkning fra tredjevariabler, over tid.

Dessuten er verken tilstedeværelsen av fantasivenner eller god sinnforståelse noen forutsetning for utvikling av den andre variabelen; noen barn med fantasivenner har antagelig dårlig sinnforståelse, mens andre som ikke har fantasivenner sannsynligvis har en utmerket sinnforståelse. Forholdet er altså ikke en-til-en, og forskjellene innad i gruppene er kanskje vel så store som mellom dem.

Mye av den samme argumentasjonen kan anvendes når man ser på sammenhengen mellom fantasivenner og andre fenomener.

Virkelig interessante hadde forskningsresultatene blitt om man klarte å etablere kausale forhold mellom fantasivenner og utviklingen innen andre domener. Man kan tenke seg at longitudinelle studier, der man studerer barnegrupper over tid, vil kunne bidra til dette. Ut fra disse kan man riktignok ikke konkludere med at fantasivenner fører til ekstra positiv utvikling innenfor et annet domene, eller omvendt, men man vil kunne finne ut hva som går forut for hva, og dermed danne seg nye hypoteser om årsakssammenhengene.

Det interessante er at studiene, i motsetning til hva mange tidligere fryktet, har en tendens til å assosiere tilstedeværelsen av fantasivenner med ekstra positiv utvikling innenfor en rekke domene.

 

Fantasivenner og psykose. Avslutningsvis kan det nevnes at forskning på voksne personer med fantasivenner kategoriseres et helt annet sted enn forskningen på barn med fantasivenner, nemlig blant psykoseforskningen. I den grad man kan kalle dette for fantasivenner, er de assosiert med en liste over langt mindre hyggelige fenomener. Hvorfor er det slik?

Taylor har dokumentert at de fleste, hvis ikke alle, barn med fantasivenner, vet at de usynlige kompanjongene er nettopp produkter av deres egen fantasi. Dessuten forsvinner gjerne fantasivennene av seg selv i løpet av barne- eller tidlig ungdomsalder. Dette er ikke tilfellet ved psykotiske tilstander.

Psykotiske symptomer som hallusinasjoner og vrangforestillinger har trolig helt andre årsaksforklaringer, andre mekanismer og annet forløp, og barn med fantasivenner er ikke mer sårbare for psykose enn andre barn. Barns fantasivenner og psykotiske fenomener er rett og slett kvalitativt forskjellige ting.

Barns fantasivenner og psykotiske fenomener er rett og slett kvalitativt forskjellige ting.

 

Ingen rosa hester i skisporet lenger. Det er mye vi ennå ikke vet om barn med fantasivenner. Enn så lenge får vi slå oss til ro med det faktum at fantasivennene i hvert fall ikke er skadelige for dem, men tvert imot et sunt og relativt vanlig fenomen. Trolig henger fantasivennene til og med sammen med særs positiv utvikling innenfor visse domener.

Helt til slutt lurer kanskje noen på hvordan det gikk med lillesøsteren som skapte sånn bekymring hos en ille berørt tenåring? Vel, jeg vokste opp og ble relativt normal. Jeg har så vidt jeg vet ingen diagnose, og leker verken med Kalei eller går på skitur med de lilla neshornene lenger. Hadde jeg gjort det, ville mange ha delt min søsters bekymring.

Fantasivennfri og ikke-psykotisk som jeg er i dag, velger jeg imidlertid å leve i den behagelige troen at mine språkferdigheter, sinnforståelse og sosiale kompetanse i alle fall ikke er under gjennomsnittet, og krysser fingrene for at de rosa hestene holder seg unna skisporet denne vinteren også.

 

Tekst Emilie Smith Astrup, profesjonsstudiet i psykologi, 7. semester

Illustrasjon Miriam Nordvik


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